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Microwave My Love

July 14, 2009

PHIL COLLINS – TESTIFY

I want to testify, testify my love for you
I’m here to testify, testify my love for you
And I will do, all that I can do for you
Together, we will be together…


Do you remember Testify (My Love) by Phil Collins? It was off his 7th studio album Testify and it debutted at #30 on the American Billboard charts back in 2002 so perhaps not. Wikipedia says: “The title track, the longest and most complex sounding song on the album, is according to Collins “one of the most direct and most personal lovesongs I have ever written”.” If you’re curious as to what this love song sounds like, check it out here on YouTube. There’s even a Ross and Rachel version paying tribute to two of the best loved “Friends.”

Collins has since divorced his third wife for whom the song was written (married in 1999, separated March 2006, divorced January 2007). Just out of curiousity, I started to check out divorce rates in the US, Korea, and abroad. This website had a pretty interesting article with equally interesting subheads:

  • The US: People fear divorce more than marriage
  • Korea: Divorce rate ranks 3rd in the world
  • India: Divorce rate twice as high as ten years ago
  • Germany: Legislation to make divorce more difficult
  • Brazil: Single girls seeking married men
  • China: Rapid growth in divorce rates

I don’t want to bore you a whole lot with divorce statistics, but if you’re curious, there is a lot more good info here, here, and here.

Of course, in 2009 probably all of us have at least some general understanding about current relationship statistics. The divorce rate is high and rising. Cohabitation is becoming more acceptable and widespread and is now an acceptable “trial marriage” period before couples take the plunge into the “real deal.” Casual sex, hook-ups, and no-strings-attached-meaningless-emotionless-sex are also becoming far more common, widespread, and accepted as the norm.

The Microwave World

I wrote earlier about our “Microwave Society” and how nobody likes to wait for anything anymore. It’s so much faster, simpler, and instantly satisfying to just microwave something, or pop a pill to feel better, and society as a whole definitely does that with love. It’s so much simpler to just hook-up with someone than it is to spend weeks or months or even years getting to know them deeply and personally. It’s so much easier to let our bodies do the talking our mouths and hearts should do. It’s so much easier to connect with each other, to feel wanted, to feel needed, to feel loved, when our skin touches and neurons fire in our brains releasing hormones and chemicals that tell us this is what we truly want, rather than connecting our hearts and interests. It seems to me that’s why people are constantly discouraged with love.

Love’s no bad thing, but when we microwave it, pop the pill, look for the instant fix, is it any wonder that it’s not so satisfying? Anyone with any common sense could tell you that popping a pill to lose weight doesn’t really work, fast-food isn’t healthy, there’s no quick way to safely and effectively pack on muscle, pills for psychological problems (depression, ADD, ADHD, etc) only target the symptoms and not the underlying causes of the problems, and charging everything on your credit card isn’t a good way to get what you want. For as fast and instant as this modern society is these days, there are still some things we can’t speed up: there are no teleportation machines, there’s no growth-gun, no maturity-ray, and there’s no Matrix-machine to instantly upload knowledge into our brains. All of the latter (travel, growing up, maturing, increasing intelligence) require a lot of patience, hard work, and waiting to even be accomplished. All the previous (diet, muscle, attitude and emotion, money) also require a lot of patience, hard work and waiting if they are to be enjoyed fully. We can pop a pill and look for an instant fix, but “the juice is only as good as the squeeze:” if we find an instant fix, we can expect only instant (and temporary) satisfaction. Why then do people do the same thing with love?

Love and relationships are a permanent fixture in our lives. Wherever we go, people will be part of our lives and relationships will follow. A life-long love relationship, one that most people want but fewer and fewer actually experience requires truckloads of patience, hard work, and waiting.

Microwave My Love

I wondered what it would be like if Phil Collins had written his Testify song in a more modern way that truly spoke of the way people seemed to think about love these days. If love was microwaveable, like so many other instant fixes in our society are, and if love songs were written about microwaveable love, this is what Testify would sound like today (italics indicate the words I changed):

PHIL COLLINS (2009) – MICROWAVE (MY LOVE)

I want to microwave, microwave my love for you
I’m here to microwave, microwave my love for you
And I will do, all that I can do for now
Together, we will
get together

Come on microwave, microwave your love for me
Microwave, microwave your love for me
You can be all the things I want you to be
And together, we will
get together

Every heart that’s ever been broken
Knows these things will likely happen again
Holding yourself back, using each other
The
pleasure gained from one another
I’ll be
ready for you, you’ll be ready for me

That is why I want to microwave, microwave my faith in you
Come on and microwave, microwave your trust in me
We can be
lovers overnight if we want to be
And together, we can do it together

Every heart that’s ever been broken
Knows there’s no sense in waiting
Holding yourself back, using each other
The
pleasure gained from one another
I’ll be
lonely without you, I know that you’ll be lonely without me

I want to microwave, microwave my love for you
I’m here to microwave, microwave my love for you
I will do everything that I can do for now
And you know together, we will be together
for as long as it’s convenient for both parties

Have Your Say

Leave me a comment. Do you agree or disagree that love is “too easy” these days?

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